Some people are born knowing…and some people evolve into the discovery of their true selves. I believe I may be one of those who evolved. Although who knows, I may have always been like this. I may have been conditioned to think that things were supposed to be a certain way. Done in a certain order for them to be socially acceptable.
Fuck social acceptability. I think that’s an old concept anyway. I’m not talking about the very framework that makes the world work together, well for all intents and purposes anyway, given the world diplomacy climate today. I’m talking about some people thinking there is only one order, one way to live your life and trying to push those ideas on those who believe and do so differently.
It took many years of chipping away at these social constraints and conditioning to be able to put a label on the way I thought about a lot of things in regards to myself. And I made a pretty epic discovery: I am queer.
Shocking. I know.
Why do I choose to identify as ‘queer’? Because this evolvement has many facets for me, some of which I’m still discovering. It’s not only about sexual or gender preference or identity. I’m becoming more self-aware and more worldly aware. I believe that for me, these are intricately intertwined. Because who I am is directly related to how I see things, how I understand things, and how I absorb them. It affects how I communicate and how I treat others.
As far as ‘coming out’, personally, I’m still internally debating if I feel I need to do that. I believe the people in my life that know me well already know and those who don’t just don’t care to know. And that is ok. At some point, I’m sure I’ll tell my family. But I’m not too worried about doing it right now. I didn’t announce that I thought I was straight at one point, why should I make a formal announcement that I’m ‘different’?
We are all different from each other. I guess I fail to understand why people who are different are prosecuted or looked down upon. Who gets to decide someone is ‘different’? We are all humans, are we not?
I realize I’m being simplistic here, it’s not that I don’t understand how the world has worked in the past: There are groups of people all over with similar ideologies who want to decide who and what is acceptable and then try to enforce it and in the process prosecute those who are different. I get it. And, I’m not just talking about sexual or gender preference or identity here either. I’m talking about ‘differences’ in anything: race, religion, skin color, abilities, socio-economic status, education, the list goes on.
I’m just trying to do my small part to change the world. To me, ‘different’ is what makes the world go ‘round. Would you want to live on a planet where everyone is the same? No? Me neither.
Here is what I believe and do my best to live each day: Every single human has value.
Every single human has value whether their ‘differences’ are visible or not. And I try to spread that shit like fire because I think more people need to hear it and be more accepting of others. Myself included. Remember – constantly evolving?
Because really, the change I want to see in the world starts right here, with me.